There is a pervasive type of domestic violence that I personally have encountered for I don’t know, most of my adult life, it is known as character assassination.

They can not kill the truth so they slaughter the credibility of the messenger.”

It is very real, premeditated, and arguably the cruelest type of abuse there is as the victim has no visible bruises to prove her suffering, only severe emotional scarring which she has likely had to endure completely alone and abandoned by family, friends, her community and even institutions specifically designed to “help” the situation.

I have learned from my own personal experience; I am alone in this struggle, I have no one to trust and I have to figure out a way to overcome without any help from the outside world. This, however, was an empowering transition for me as it put me in the driver’s seat of my own life and feelings.

I have, in fact, managed to sustain personal well-being longer than ever before in spite of often really pervasive and deliberate attacks from people we were falsely taught will protect and love us unconditionally including parents, siblings, husbands, wives and extended family. I believe Meghan Markle is a perfect example of the fact that even your own family can be poisoned against you and maybe are even the prime suspects in your public undoing. She is also a great example of grace under pressure. She does seem to have the loving support of her devoted husband though and many of us do not have that, me included. Especially if you are choosing to go it alone, it is most important to forgive oneself first.

It may seem immature to site a Disney movie in a self-empowerment blog post but I have been inspired by Elsa from Frozen. As I write this, in fact, the lyrics, “I’m alone, but I’m alone and free, stay away and you’ll be safe from me…” are running through my head. It’s true and miraculous really to just let it all go and physically/emotionally distance yourself from the world at large for personal reflection and sustained mental well-being.

Due to COVID-19 restrictions thus limiting where I can go and what I can do to sustain my inner peace, I am also exploring the idea of creating a personal digital utopia. For instance, if you make a conscious effort to find guided meditations, self-help articles, tutorials, professional advice websites, etc. it is there for the taking and likely free too.

While (some) have used and abused the digital world in unspeakable ways, others have used its power, reach and influence to better themselves and spread inspiration to others. Sometimes it can be difficult to distinguish between the two but the only way to train your mind and body is to take that first step and allow yourself to experience life on your own terms maybe even for the first time.

Although there are no quick and easy remedies for character assassination, there are ways to achieve personal happiness and well-being in the moment no matter how difficult that moment may be. While it may not be easy, it can be worth it.

advice attacks character assassination inner peace letting go personal growth